As Easy as Riding a Bike

Last Tuesday, I got home late after work and running a long errand. The family had already eaten, and as I walked in the door, my 6 year-old son caught me on my way into the kitchen. "Dad, can I ride my bike in front?" We don't let him ride his bike alone out there yet. We live in a quiet residential cul-de-sac, but there's still a few cars and...the kid is 6.

At my house, learning something new is a big deal. The kids are all smart, so we often have lots of good stuff to celebrate. The kids are all (except our youngest) a little afraid to try new things. Whether it's a cheese-filled hot dog or new pair of shoes, doing something new is very uncomfortable for them, and it's something we've learned we can't push. We can only make it easier for them to make the decision. This was to be a week of such breakthroughs.

I evaluated my options, and decided to grab my dinner and sit on the front lawn while he rode his new (larger) bike. I saw him ride across the cul-de-sac a few times and noticed that his training wheels only touched the ground when he was stopping or starting. I told him that. He went back out to ride. A few minutes later, he came to me, and asked that I take off his training wheels.

We got my socket set out, I loosened the nut, and he finished it. He was scared at first. I held him at his waist until he got going, and walked across as he stopped and turned around. We did that a couple times. He wanted to go around, but was afraid he couldn't do a curve.
"I can't do it."
"Of course not now, but you can learn."
"No, I can't. I already tried two times and I couldn't do it."
"Are you going to be 50 years old and not do a curve?"
"No."
"Are you going to be 25 and not do a curve?"
A smile. "No."

The next time across the cul-de-sac, he made the curve. The next time across, he made a 90-degree turn from the neighbor's driveway onto the sidewalk. And he crashed at the juniper bush that hangs over. But he landed on his feet, and was fine.

A few minutes later, he went inside and got his big sister out to ride with him. She was busy showing off and slipped in the pine needles and scraped her elbow. Buddy didn't get hurt all night. We went to a family reunion in Washington over the weekend, and he was afraid that he couldn't keep the bike straight in the skinny one-way road that rings the campground.

"I tried two times but I couldn't do it!"
"Let's try again."
"No! I can't!"
"If you don't try, you're right. You can't."

30 seconds later, he was going. By the end of the weekend, he had mastered riding on the grass, gravel, transitioning to the pavement, and jumping curbs back at home.

I enjoy getting out of my comfort zone. I'll try something very unusual for me and see how it works out. I never get the thing I know I'll like on the menu. I get the thing that sounds different and interesting. When I see something at work that needs attention from upper management (I'm still in the lower echelon here), I'll mention it. I'll audition for a semi-pro choir, or sign up for the 100-mile bike ride, or teach myself guitar, or write a blog.

I think I developed this as a teenager, by the simple virtue of my parents never telling me that I was incapable of doing something. I wonder if that will work with my kids. I'm hoping it does - zest for life and finding one's limits largely defines who I am and allows me to dream the big dreams and get to work on making them come true.