On being sacked but employed

Firstly, don't worry - I'm not demoted, or in any way in danger of losing my job. It's not like that. So now that you aren't worried, here's a little something about what's going on in my work life.

For the last 10 months, I've been working on a major project for the company. I could see that it needed to be done, it was on the periphery of one of my areas of responsibility, and it looked challenging. So I started asking questions and doing things to move it along, and soon found that it was "my project". I worked with a lot of people on 3 continents to get the project going. Some had expertise, some had logistical responsibilities, some had oversight of one aspect or another and had to buy off on technical decisions. I was genuinely busy and doing something important for the company.

During most of these 10 months, I was doing my "day job" for a couple hours a day, and spending the rest of my time on this project. Since September, I've been on the project 40-70 hrs per week, averaging about 60 hrs per week for that period. It's been busy. I haven't been able to help out at home like I like to, volunteer at the kids' school like I like to, or have any hobbies at all, actually. Even the men's group I sing with fell down the priority list. And forget about going on a date with my wife.

So in January, the time came to execute on the things I'd been preparing for since last April. We had answered the technical questions, prepared the documentation, completed training, identified and acquired the tools needed for the job, and now it was simply a matter of manpower. How quickly could we get the job done? We thought we had a good schedule, but it turned out to be inaccurate. 2 weeks ago, it become apparent that the job took a lot more manpower than I had planned. So the schedule slipped. Badly.

And my boss came to town, pulled me into a conference room, and told me I was no longer the project manager. My review would suffer, but that's all. I still had a place at the company, I just would get to focus on my day job more. Somebody new would be the project manager.

So - I lose the prestige and visibility of running the project, but I no longer have to work 70 hrs a week. And there's no change in pay. Hmm. Not so bad. On the one hand, the thing I want most in my workplace is to feel like I'm making a positive difference. And I was doing that. I made a mistake, sure, but I had made a lot of good decisions beforehand. And I was not going to be able to walk away from the project. I was too invested in it, and knew too much about it to simply hand it over. So I'm now a major support person for the project - I monitor what's going on, take care of a small subset of tasks as my specific responsibility, ask questions if they need to be asked, and answer questions when I am asked. It's still a full time job for me, and it's not all sunshine and roses for the new project manager, but I'm no longer nauseous with worry. It's no longer my problem.

It's an odd place - I'm very disappointed in how it worked out. I think that given what I knew at the time, I made a reasonable set of assumptions. I did due diligence to check those assumptions, but no one who could have improved them gave me any feedback in time to affect the outcome. At the same time, despite the disappointment, I got to go hiking with Liberty instead of working on Saturday. And I can sleep well. All in all, I'd have rather had both worlds, but given my new set of realities, it's certainly not all bad. Lemonade from lemons.

I learned some very important things about myself and my work world from the experience. Not appropriate for this forum, but important for me and my future.