Sunday, October 3, 2010

Random thoughts for today

Random thought #1:
My daughter is in 5th grade. 5th grade was the year I started to understand myself and find what I loved. It was the year I did my first play, an elementary-school version of "Midsummer Night's Dream" complete with Elizabethan English. Just less of it. And I'd guess a lot of the innuendo was cut. I lost the script somehow.

At any rate, I was cast as Demetrius, opposite the charming, intelligent, and so very cute Sasha Christy as Helena. Naturally, during the show, I got a massive crush on her. It was an unrequited crush, as demonstrated by one of my favorite memories of that entire year. Tom (as Demetrius) "Spurn me, reject me, only let me follow you!" Sasha (as Sasha, with complete disgust all over her face) "Gross. Do you know what that means?" I honestly had no idea what she was talking about.

I wonder if my daughter will have similar experiences. Ah, 5th grade.

Random thought #2 :
A little bit of "life on earth" perspective. I was sitting in church today, thinking. I thought about going home to my kids, how glad I'll be to see them. My girls have cried because I'm gone. They'll be glad to see me. We've talked on the phone (Google phone is amazing for international travelers, BTW), but it has been 3 weeks since we've seen each other. The reunion will be sweet.

I've been away from my Heavenly Father for 35 years now. I hope that I have been a good enough kid that when I see Him again (a long time in the future), that we'll both be happy to see each other again.

Random thought #3:
I really really really really hope that Katrina lets me take Aria to rehearsal on Monday. But I'll do whatever she wants me to do - I've had plenty of time without little ones the last few weeks. Plus I can use the time to resolder my airplane battery connectors. They need it.

Sunday, August 29, 2010

The Criterion for Success

I am getting older. Thankfully, so are my children. I love the craziness inherent in 4 year-old boys and the instability inherent all of us that comes to the fore so much more often in small children.

But my oldest child is 10 now. As with most of our parenting peers, we’ve tried pretty hard to give her opportunities to grow. Whether that means giving her as little help (and as much encouragement) as we can with her homework, or arranging music lessons or sports classes, we’ve tried to get her input on what’s interesting and do the research to find a good fit for her. In the last 2 years, she’s come into her own as a singer. She started group voice lessons, which doubled as a children’s choir, and really enjoyed it.

Once she realized she liked it, she went on the offensive. She fought (pretty hard) to sing a duet with an older girl for the church Christmas party in 2009 and nailed it in front of 500 people. She put together a solo for her choir’s performance and was excellent. She sings with me sometimes just for fun, and she can stay on the melody while I improvise a harmony.

Then, last Christmas, we got last-minute tickets to The Singing Christmas Tree. Aria had never been to the Keller auditorium before, and she’d never seen a professional-quality musical, either. She liked it. When we went NYC on vacation this year, we saw West Side Story on Broadway. Loved that, too.

So in our “it’s a new school year, what extracuriculars should we arrange for the kids?” conversation a few weeks ago, Katrina and I wondered aloud about the Singing Christmas Tree. With a little help from Google, we found the audition location and time, and that the paperwork to register was supposed to be in the day before. That was the first week of August. For a Dec performance. We submitted the paperwork, spoke to one of the audition judges, and were assured everything was ok.

The audition was last Monday. Aria and I showed up 15 minutes early, right on Tommy time. I always show up early for auditions. We sat and watched as more and more people filed into the room. After a short introduction by the children’s choir director, the parents were sent away, and I left my daughter to her first-ever solo audition. She was purely excited, no nerves at all. And she was very confident.

An hour later, I went back into the room to find her chatting on the hearth with 2 other girls. She was happy with her performance, and we went home, hoping for the best.

Tuesday, Katrina took the other kids out for the afternoon, and Aria chose to stay at home because her foot hurt. Katrina’s email was open on her computer, and an email popped up with news that Aria had been accepted. She called me at work to tell me the news. I cried. What else was there to do? My child had asserted her individual-ness and come out on top.

I am impressed by her maturity. She is ecstatic. I am ecstatic. I am very very pleased that she was chosen for the show. Half of the kids didn’t make it. But I am more proud that she tried. She found something she liked, stuck with it, found she was good at it, and became as accomplished as she possibly could become given the opportunities available to her. Then she saw an opportunity to stretch herself even more, an opportunity to take a risk of rejection. And she took it. That was the real milestone. This was not something her parents could protect her with or influence in any way. We had done what we could to prepare her, now it was out into the wide, cruel world to see how she flew, and if she could land.

Pondering this situation and how to define success, I came to conclude that success can be easily defined in this formula: success = (successful attempts) + (failed attempts). It is no more complicated than that. A life of unmitigated success is a life in which one didn't take many risks.

It is one of the singular challenges of parenthood to prepare our kids for the attempt:

  1. the desire to make the attempt,

  2. opportunities for an attempt

  3. have the ability to self-evaluate the wisdom of the attempt,

  4. have the courage to make the attempt

  5. the equanimity to take success gratefully and gracefully

  6. the maturity to work through a failure to prepare for another attempt

Despite our parenting, Aria made it through. I do consider this her first step into the wide world. But she’s ready for it. All I can say to her is: “You go, girl – you’ve got a lot of living to do.”

Monday, August 2, 2010

Dieting Update

Many moons ago, I wrote a post about 2 small dietary changes I had made and their initial results. To review:
1) no snacks in my drawer at work
2) severely reduce my sugary drink consumption (no pop at lunch, no choco milk at home)

In 3 months, I lost 15 lbs. Then, in January, I had to go to Phoenix for a 3 month work assignment. I gained 5 of it back. I was ok with that. I got back on the wagon in April, but didn't see much in the way of results. I was biking to work, but not doing much else by way of exercise. Then we had a vacation, immediately followed by a week of the bike in the shop.

When I got the bike back, it was July 6. 25 days until a planned solo century with lots o' climb. So for the first time, I was training hard and had no snacks at the office. Lunch time became very productive. In addition, I took a cue from my big bro, upped my protein intake and downed my bread intake.

Result? Dropped 7 lbs in 4 weeks.

I figured out my basal metabolic rate (which was really handy), how much I was biking, and how much I was eating over the course of a regular week. Guess what? My normal food intake was enough to meet my BMR. So by keeping my food intake steady but upping calories burned, all my exercise was losing fat. And building muscle. Turned out it's really not that complicated.

Now, I'm not dogmatic. When we go out to eat as a family, I'll get what I darn well please. When I go to Taco Bell, I'll get the Big Box Meal. I had a root beer float last night. But on my long bike ride on Saturday (112 miles, over 6000' of climb), I ate 2500 calories and burned 10,000 calories. I also ate a normal breakfast and dinner, for about a net burn of 5,000 calories.

I've still got about 20 lbs around the middle to lose, and I'd like to increase my upper body mass, but I'm on a sustainable path, and that's very exciting.

Now, off to the studio to repair my airplane. Gotta fly!

Sunday, June 6, 2010

Aventures in Flying - The Super Cub

When I was 10 years old (or so), my big brother had a remote-control gas-powered airplane. I thought it was the coolest toy ever invented in the history of chromosomes. Ever since, I have wanted my very own airplane, but not badly enough until about 9 months ago.

The exact date (even the month) is lost in the annals of my mind, but I did a bunch of online reading, and went to the local hobby store. (Insert plug for Hillsboro Hobby here. They are the best.) The guy recommended the Hobbyzone Super Cub, hands down. I put down the money, and soon I was on my deck at home, assembling the behemoth. It has a close to 4' wing span, and 3' body, and looks like an honest-to-goodness airplane to my eyes. I flew it a bit, crashed it a bunch, and repaired it a bit. I took it out flying with my kids last fall, and nose-dived it full-throttle into the ground. The fuselage lost a large chunk of foam, and I repaired it, but it still wasn't flying well. I thought it needed a whole new fuselage, and wasn't willing to shell out the $$.

A close look at the propeller a few months later showed that it was rough where it had hit the ground a few times. I took a hobby knife and cut off the rough edges. Voila! Up in the air! This was just last weekend. I really learned finally how to land the thing, how it turns, the importance of trim - appreciating it as a vehicle instead of a toy. I fell in love with flying.

Wanting to share my joy of flying, the next afternoon I handed the controls to Aria. The first time, she did fine - I gave her the controls while she had plenty of safe airspace. The second time, I gave them to her when we were close to some trees. A sharp turn, a bit of panic, and the plane went full throttle into the ground again. This time, the fuselage broke in half. The decals held it together.

So I'm fully into this hobby, having a lot of fun. I find that there are many many others with Super Cubs that they love. And I took this opportunity for a major repair to explore modifications.

Look for upcoming posts on:
1) Changing connectors
2) tools for modifying foam
3) replacing landing gear
4) the wonders of LiPo
5) Center of gravity in model aircraft
6) modifying the battery box on a Super Cub
7) Using the Veho Muvi to take video from the air

Not that many of you will be interested - frankly it's a rather esoteric, technical topic, but it's a brand-new type of experience for me (I've always been capable this way, but more talented with artsy-fartsy stuff).

Wahoo! Come with me to Gorilla Glue and Dremel Land!

Tuesday, May 25, 2010

Book Review: Growing Up Bin Laden

I read a fair amount of current events/political books. This is one of the most enlightening I've ever read (right next to Richard Clarke's Against All Enemies).

The book is the life story of Najwa Bin Laden, Osama's first wife, and that of her fourth son, Omar. The mother and son take turns writing chapters. The book is arranged chronologically, sometimes with Najwa and Omar telling their different takes on the same events. Jean Sasson pops in just a few times to give a more news-oriented view of what happened when Osama's activities are unknown to his wife and son.

It turns out that Osama bin Laden wasn't always a terrorist. He went to one of Saudi Arabia's finest private schools, speaks English (and Pashto and Arabic) fluently, and has a very nice family. He became a jihadist when he was America's hero fighting the Russians in Afghanistan. The story of how he transformed from a nice guy to an extremist is illustrated here. And it turns out that he does have a warped view of the world. For instance, when al-Qaeda bombed the embassies in Kenya and Tanzania, he rejoiced. When cruise came in and destroyed his training camps, he railed against the US, "Why would they kill Muslims? Why would anyone kill Muslims?"

The book is valuable for more than the story of Osama bin Laden. It is ultimately a story about family life in a conservative Muslim culture. Why do Muslims still practice polygamy? How does the husband take care of all his families? How does he interact with his kids? How does a woman in a burqa go shopping? What are her aspirations? It's very enlightening as a primer on all these aspects (and more!) of conservative Muslim life.

And it should be required reading for Americans who vote. We must both a) understand our enemy and b) understand that most people (even his wife and kids) are not our enemies. Read it. It'll do you good. The hardcover was on sale at Freddy's a few weeks ago. Paperback should be out soon.

Sunday, April 11, 2010

Book Review: The Host by Stephenie Meyer

Twilight, it's not. It's significantly better.
The Host refers to an invasion of the body snatchers-type scenario. Aliens invade earth stealthily, taking over human bodies. Some of the human minds don't go away, though, and therein lies the rub. What do you do when a parasite and its host become friends, and belong in both an alien society and a rebel human society?
] The book starts out slowly, or rather, too early in the story. The first hundred pages are essentially back story. We meet a whole cast of characters we won't ever meet again. The idea seems to be to help the reader understand the alien culture better before our hero gets put in with a bunch of humans scrounging for their survival. I am used to reading books that take a while to get going, and I love SF, but this was still a little bit of a slog for me.
The next 500 pages, however, are paced well, deeply charactered, and have a satisfying plot line. It's not hard SF - those looking for some biological way for this to be plausible will have to look elsewhere. Meyer raises some significant questions - is humanity a matter of biology, or a matter of character? Can love be biologically limited? If an alien were to invade earth, stop war and crime completely, solve all of our health problems, and ensure the biological salvation of homo sapiens and the earth's other species, would that necessarily be a bad thing?
I will admit, the ending was a little unsatisfying. Too pat, not powerful enough. I think of the first ending of the book as the end. You'll know it when you get there. It's more powerful. The 2nd ending is for the readers who have to have a Disney-happy ending to their fiction. Nothing wrong with that, just not my preference.
We loved this book - highly recommended.

Saturday, April 10, 2010

My son is baptized

Today was a special day at for our family. Christian turned 8 last month, and April 10 was the day set for his baptism. I've always wanted my kids to get baptized. And I've always wanted it to be their choice - I didn't want them to feel forced, or that it was just expected of them. Someone who is baptized and makes that commitment - to stand as a witness of God at all time, and in all places - has to understand what that means. If you leave that understanding out, you miss the meaning of the covenant completely.
Over the past few weeks, Christian and I have had a lot of talks. Meaningful and deep talks, the kind that kids don't often seek out, and that some parents are afraid to have with their kids. We've talked about the birds and the bees, the meaning of baptism, the Holy Ghost and how it speaks to us. What it means to bear another's burden, to mourn with those that mourn and comfort those that stand in need of comfort. The importance of repentance and getting a clean start.
To Christian's credit, he put serious thought into the decision on whether to be baptized or not. He wasn't sure if he was ready, and he was nervous about this big step. I'm so glad he thought of it that way. In the end, he decided to do it, even though he was nervous. It was a good day for him, I think. The gathering afterward at our house was kinda busy for him; he got in his jammies and konked out without saying goodnight. The guy was tired.
It was also a good day for family. There are ties of blood and ties of love, and the love was running thick around here today. Some childhood friends of my mom's who have been part of my life since I was conceived were here, Grandma Joyce flew up from San Francisco to be with us, Sean and MyLiege and 2 of their 4 kids came (the other 2 were excused absences), Katrina's parents and mine, and sister Avery came, too. Aria gave an excellent talk that she wrote herself and delivered like a pro in front of 100 adults.
A great day. 1 more for God's kingdom. He has entered in at the gate, now we get to help him along the path home.

Monday, March 29, 2010

Book Review: The Entire Percy Jackson Series

Blech. Erp. Urgh. Gurgle. Can I write any more yucky stomach noises to summarize my love for the Percy Jackson books?

I'm a YA fiction fan. Have been since I was a kid. I recently went back to visit some old favorites, and was widely disappointed. The Black Cauldron? Sexist and predictable. The Dark is Rising? Similar, but less trite. Wizard of Earthsea? Well, that series is actually full of winners. I will keep them prominently displayed to tempt my children into great reads.

The Percy Jackson and the Olympians series has caught fire lately. My daughter's teacher read book 1 to the class. She's loving them so much, she'll stay up until 10 at night to read. She'll grab one title, and her best friend will grab another, and they'll sit in the same room and read. "I like it already," I'm thinking. Then I picked one up as an airplane read.

The book is written about a 12 year-old, just as a 12 year-old would write it. It's supposedly a real-time memoir, which is the book's conceit. And Rick Riordan unfortunately does a wonderful job of capturing the cliched, sarcastic writing of a 12 year-old. Blech.

The issue I have is not the writing style (though that's annoying). It's that the story is also a story from a 12 year-old. I've read the first 3 books. Origin for each book: New York. Keeps the story grounded, sure. Hogwarts. I get it. OK. Destination for book 1: LA. book 2: Bermuda triangle book 3: San Francisco. There are 30-50 pages of setup, then the kids go on a cross-country travel. They get miraculous help at exactly the right time, despite dangerous monsters. From the tiny sneak peek at book 4 that my daughter gave me, book 4 is likewise a NY to west coast trip. I really don't care what monsters they'll meet and defeat next. I want to care about the characters (see my review of The Host) but I just can't. They are unlovable.

I just can't describe the yuckiness here. Vocab is repetitive, phrasing is too predictable. "Characters" is too large a compliment for the names in these books. Characters they are not - they are caricatures. Riordan makes a character untrustworthy and thinks that makes them deep. Good people are good. The camp director makes a show of not liking them but helps out when needed. The enemies are described too powerfully, but fail terribly battling teenagers. It's all just sooooo predictable. I'll slog through them. Just book 4 and 5, and then I'll have to wait a year or 2 for book 6, I hope.

A Wrinkle in Time awaits. That's worth the slog, if we can build some reading momentum. Maybe Earthsea after that. Or Pern. Hmmm....